D&D has had some weird monsters over the years. From disco balls that hate noise to sentient bridges, here are some of the weirdest.
D&D has been around for more than fifty years at this point. And over the course of the various editions, one of the things that has remained constant was the need to find new monsters. Because you can only fight goblins and kobolds so many times before the DM gets bored and wants to come up with something new.
Hence your Fiend Folios, Monstrous Compendiums, and so on. In fact, there are multiple editions with a Monster Manual 1, 2, & 3. With that many pages of monsters, it stands to reason that you’re going to run out of readily accessible ideas. And when that happens, it’s time to get weird. How weird? Well let’s take a look at some of the weirdest monsters from any edition of D&D.
Susuruss
Hard to spell and hard to pluralize, susurusses are not, as the name might suggest, living wind creatures. Rather, they’re more like living disco balls that hate the undead but also will get mad at you if you disturb their precious oxygen. Like say, by having a torch or a lantern.
Their peculiar breathing creates a ‘dronesong’ that pacifies undead, lulling them into a stupor so that the susuruss can then prey upon them with impunity. Intelligent undead often try to take them out but even they are in danger of falling prey to its droning song.
Spanner
Spanners are sentient bridges. They were created by a Wizard to protect a tower, but then they since escaped into the wilds of 2nd Edition D&D and made a name for themselves as boons or banes to adventurers.
Because by nature, spanners are benign, even friendly. They like to gossip, have curiosity about the creatures of the world, and will happily talk back – as long as you don’t cross them without permission. Because spanners are also “malicious and have no mercy” when irked or crossed without permission. You might be wondering, what can a bridge do? Well as it turns out, it can tip you over the edge, or open a hole beneath your feet, causing you to fall to your doom one way or the other. And you often won’t know a bridge is a spanner until it’s too late.
Wolf-in-Sheep’s-Clothing
The Wolf-in-Sheep’s-Clothing, contrary to the name, is actually a plant monster. It’s a sentient vegetable creature that appears as a cut log or stump. It can sprout a strange, luring growth that resembles a furry creature, like a harmless little rabbit atop it. Meanwhile, it attacks with whipping vines and a slavering, vegetable maw that devours any foolish enough to get close. Look, the 80s were a time, okay?
Sheet Phantoms
Looking exactly like you’d think, a Sheet Phantom is technically different from a regular phantom or other ghost in that it’s the malicious spirit of an evil individual who died in bed. If that happens? You become a sheet phantom and have some potent abilities, most notably that anyone you kill becomes a sheet ghoul instead of a regular ghoul. SpoooOOOooOOooky.
Zorbo
And then there are zorbos. Quite obviously inspired by stories of drop bears, these are a uniquely D&D take on them. These carnivorous little bears live in trees, and yes, they do drop on you. But in combat they also take on defensive qualities based on whatever terrain they happen to be standing on. But they can also absorb your armor class (and destroy your armor in the process) becoming even harder to defeat as they start hitting you.
What class would you pick if you were going to make an All-[Class] Party?
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